Last party night in New Haven

Connecticut is a small state. There are very few metropolitan areas around the state. There is the capitol Hartford, which empties out on Friday afternoon due to lack of entertainment facilities. There is Bridgport which you don't enter unless you have some sort of protection, and New Haven. What is funny is all three of this cities are considered pieces of crap, until I came to college and went to the bright city lights of New Haven. New Haven is what we consider the Boston of Connecticut. Quinnipiac, Southern, Albertus Magnus, UNH, and Yale all are within 15 mins of each other, and all converge on the active streets of downtown.
Do you think I have a job in the tourism of New Haven? I happened to leave out the random crack heads and homeless people that walk around, but hey, what’s the difference between them and the rich cracks at Yale? not much...........so New Haven is like one big happy family. On Thursday eve Dave's friend Matt came down from the great state of Rhode Island (Matt Cordeau's fav state) and he decided on Sat he would be our designated driver. What’s this you say? Why do you need a designated driver? I'm sorry mom, I drink. But I think she found that out when I was pounding down drinks with her at the bar in the Dominican. This set the stage for the LAST GREAT NIGHT IN NEW HAVEN.

The school year is drawing to a close and with this being the final normal weekend I will have (May weekend is on it's way!!!) we decided to head to Toads for their infamous sat night dance party/ little Quinnipiac. Matt drives 100MPH down 91, swerves through the streets of New Haven. Parks, we get out, jump in line at Toads and I look in front of me.
As I stare at the crowd in front of me I notice the bouncer in the front of the line. He was evil. He had a stare and a horrible laugh to him. He almost looked like Bowsar out of Mario brothers. I see him as one by one he denies people into the club. Let me remind everyone I have a horrible ID, well it's the best ID Bridgport has to offer, and I decided to try my luck of getting into the club anyway. I am now in the front of the line.........luckily a small scrawny bouncer goes "ID?" I hand it to him...........he glazes it over looks at me...........I await word from his mouth. Yes or no? What is it? TELL ME! He stares at me and quickly jabs my ID over to bowsar. He looks at my ID for about three tenths of a second, and asks for my college ID. The college ID which I said I did not posses.
BWHAHAHAHAHA comes out of his giant mouth. Good night, I'm pushed aside. Ummmmmmm.........
"Can I have my ID back?"
"No" says the scrawny man on the side
"Why not?!"
"It's fake"
"No it's not, give it back"
"Call the cops, we give it to them"
"ok, what’s the #?"
"I dunno, call the operator" and the scrawny man who tried to act tough turned his back on me
What do I do now? Where should I go?

Ring Ring
"Hello, New Haven Police Department"
"Yeah, umm, I'd like my ID back"

To put a long story short, you cannot call the New Haven Police Department and ask for your fake ID back. But it didn't ruin my night, thanx to Puerto Rican rum.

We returned to Quinnipiac and went to bed. Some details may have been left out but for some reason what on paper seems like a horrible end to this year in New Haven, we had alot of fun thanx to the entertainment of all who went. Thank you New Haven for your smart Yalies, funny homeless people, and elevators that don't work when you try and open them while they are moving. Also thank you to those of my friends who I visited in New Haven this year for giving me alot of laughs.

We won! We won! Follow up

It's not everyday that you see something, and several days later it is still being talked about ON NATIONAL NEWS. I read this on www.espn.com, right off a link on their home page.

Melissa Ford, a senior at UConn, told The Hartford Courant, that she watched in disbelief as a mob destroyed her car on Monday night.
"I was celebrating, thinking how great it was, and then I saw my Honda Civic flipped over," Ford said. "There were people on top of it, jumping up and down and lighting fireworks. That's when I went hysterical."

Interested in what you just read and haven't been to my Lemiwinks website in awhile? Read my last posting and see it from my eyes.

Also, just a note, if you've been watching comedy central lately you may have seen the best commercial ever! THE RETURN OF LEMMIWINKS, NEXT WEDS! 10:00.
Now you may be saying to yourself, who is Lemminks? Why is it spelled with two m's and not one....I have the answers.
He is a class gerbil, and I had no clue, I thought it was spelled with one M and I was wrong, and now look like a moron, oh well. Enjoy my blabber, keep leaving me sweet love in my guest book:)

-Lemiwinks

We won! We Won!..........hmmmm Lets burn everything

U-C-O-N-N UCONN UCONN UCONN..........I was born in Torrington CT. Being a Connecticut sports fan is hard. We've never really had our own team to root for. The Whalers decided to head out on April 13 1997 to go to Hockey hot bed Raleigh North Carolina. (sarcasm). The New England Patriots dug holes in our soil before they decided they were happy in Boston and there were talks of the Montreal Expos moving to Hartford, but come on who wants the Expos? So......we are drawn to our only sport with our name on it (It is a fact the WNBA is not a sport so the Connecticut Sun doesn't count)....the UCONN Huskies. I decided, hey, we made it to the finals, I should go to Storrs. My friend Corey and Laura agreed and this is what started our adventure!

Corey and Laura picked me up at my humble abode in Hamden and off we went to Uconn Territory. I called my friend Trav on they way to tell him we were coming.
"Hey Trav, I'm coming coming to Uconn!"
"What?"
"I'm coming to Uconn!!"
"When?"
"In an hour, I'm on the way now"
"You....wha? why?"
This question needed no answer so in an hour we reached campus which was ready for the game. Cars were decorated, horns were beeping and people were hanging out their windows saying the educated phrase "WAAAAAAAOOOOO"(it sounded just like that)
We decided the best way to enjoy a Uconn game would be with 7,000 people so we snuck into the "closed to public" (that’s us) viewing in Gampel Pavilion. Sat down, bought a pretzel and soda and watched the game. Only in Gampel could a blow out game like that be so incredible. There was plenty of cheering and booing clapping and standing. It was amazing, or AMAZIN as my friend Trav says after Emeka Okafor's Uconn commercial. With one minute left the crowd rushed the floor, started dancing, cheering, going crazy, and they even broke into a synchronized song of "We are the champions!" Uconn wins the title, I was a very happy boy and it seems within a matter of minutes, the crowd moved to the streets.......the CROWD moved to the streets...........THE CROWD MOVED TO THE STREETS!!!!

I have a few things I would like to do before I die.
1) Swim in a swimming pool full of jello
2) Ride an elephant to work
3) Well now I get to cross out #3...........join a mob and watch the mayhem that occurs

I walk out of Gampel pavilion to see people in trees, people crowd surfing, a mass crowd wandering aimlessly down the street, and alcohol. O the alcohol. Seemed everyone had some sort of beverage in their hand. I even saw a man wearing a 30 pack box on his head as a mask. I thought it was creative. I met up with my good friend Travis and he said the famous lines "I want to see some riots" On that note we took a long walk in the 20 degree weather off campus to Celleron (that could be spelled wrong, but oh well, just call it place where they had the giant mass riots) It was dark, you have to walk through a wooded road, but don't worry, the random fires in peoples front lawns light the way. I actually walked up the road, saw flames rising from someone's front lawn, and was like "why did they just build a fire under those power lines?" Flames were actually touching the power lines and when I walked by I saw the flames were being fed by a couch. People were burning everything and everything. Couches, chairs, beds, branches from the woods. The most entertaining fire I saw was when a few people tried to light up an entire tree..........they put beer boxes around the trunk, light the boxes.....but it didn't work. When we got to Celleron the crowd was def. in mob mode. I witnessed my first true fight. This one kid got completely decked in the face. It even made that noise you only hear in the movies. 5 cops walked over.....simply pointed lovely bottles of mace at the crowd (which I happened to be in) and everyone ran away. Well 10 feet away before the cops returned to guard the flipped over metal dumpster that was alive with flames. People were chanting, drinking, burning, fighting, throwing bottles...but the craziest thing I saw, the staple of a riot....flipping of a car.

I knew it was coming when Corey's brother said early in the night. "Don't park on my road, cars are going to get flipped" He was right, cars got flipped. It seems a group of kids found a car that wasn't near any others, and were so drunk that they didn't know what they were doing, and I got a front row seat to see the whole thing. They walked up to the Honda Civic, and with support of the crowd started their task of flipping this car. I really liked the guy next to me who was shouting out directions "Get low, GET LOWER!" I especially liked the guy who ran out and pretended it was his car, actually got the kids to stop, then started laughing, said he was just kidding, and HELPED THEM FLIP IT! As soon as the car turned over it looked like the hot ride at Disney, everyone wanted a ride. Dozens of kids jumped on the car. I can now die knowing what the sound of a car flipped over being jumped on sounds like. On that note I decided it couldn't get any better. I couldn't see anything crazier, and I left for home with a big grin on my face which has still not left.

Well kids, all I have to say it is a great day to be a Uconn student, well.......I wonder what is left of their campus this morning.

-Lemiwinks

A Pitty the April Foo

April fools, what a day. Children across the world (well that might not be true at all) will put plastic over the toilet, tell horrible lies to their peers, and make today a horrible disaster. My roommate woke up this morning, opened the door, and realized that someone had placed packing tape all across the door way making a perfect wall of tape. Kyle walked in later in the day to tell us he was "THE KING OF APRIL FOOLS". I felt like I was in Israel and he was taking credit for the "attack". Well either way it got me thinking.......what was the best April Fools prank I've ever witnessed?

In Elementary School I'll never forget on one spring day, over the loud speaker hearing..."your attention please, school will be dismissed early today due to the approaching snow storm." A cheer was heard throughout the school as students rejoiced, the voice returned......."April fools" Our principle was so mean, who does that? We all should have known anyway, it was sunny and like 50 degrees out. But when you hear snow day in elementary school it's like god has come down from heaven with a great gift. Either way, now that I look back on it I'm thinking "wow, that was really mean" I can actually picture Mr. Mozlak sitting in his office laughing like some sort of super villian getting the biggest kick out of it.

This reminds me of my child hood. My brother and I were awoken every morning with the phrase "Time to make the doughnuts". For some reason (you can see I was a very gullible little boy) I thought that there would be a golden box of doughnuts waiting for me in the kitchen. I was one of those chubby little boys who loved his doughnuts. But no, they were never there. It was like April Fools everyday. It worked for my dad, it got me out of bed.

I'll never forget the one year, I got such a kick out of putting hair ties over the spraying device on the kitchen sink. I pointed it perfectly so as soon as someone turned on the sink BAMN!!!!!!! They would get soaked. I remember sitting in the kitchen, with a huge grin on my face evilly waiting for someone, anyone to come in the kitchen. My sister walks in with no intension of turning on the sink. "Hey Sarah, can you turn on the sink for me" That was my ingenious line to get her to do it. If someone asked me to do that I would be very confused. But it worked for my sister......she walked over, quickly turned the knob......WACK.....hit with a spray of cold flowing water. I laughed very hard and was happy.

Look what evil creatures we are, we laugh when we ruin the lives of others. I feel horrible now..........well no not really. Instead I have a quick message.......Don't kill each other today. Have fun.

Do you guys have any good April fools stories? Post them in my guest book and I'll throw them on the web:)

-Lemiwinks

Here is Jay Driscoll's April fool's story......this made me laugh alot

Well I contemplated doing this today. Seeing as I was raised a Roman Catholic and the on going controversy of gays and all that, I thought I'd use some of this to my advantage. I contemplated calling my father up and telling him I was coming out of the closet. But then I remembered how he's not very religious. So I thought I'd go for the big fish, my Nana, queen of everything Roman Catholic. Then I remembered how she had had a minor heart attack several years back. And I figured hearing the words that her grandson was gay might be the final nail in the coffin. So I just farted on my friends and said April Fool's Day bitches.
*If you did it Jay, you could be Gay Jay and that my friend is catchy*